urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears yeah he was shot impetus101@yahoo.com yeah he was shot 2002-07-15T00:58:32Z urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:190250 2002-07-15T00:58:32Z 2002-07-15T00:58:32Z after a year of fervidus_tears, i think i've outgrown it. that's right, i have a new one. add me if you actually read my banter, and here's the <a href="http://www.livejournal.com/users/revolution_tm">link.</a><br /><br />i'll add you if you're lucky. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:190125 2002-07-15T00:28:03Z 2002-07-15T00:28:03Z to look past the wide-eyed, fire-bellied ignorance spouted by the "radicals" of society and see the conformity in their speech, disillusions in the truest sense of the word. we should take every aspect of how we live on this earth and question it, poke and prod it, figure out why we do what we do and what we should do differently. what's "taboo"? what's "normal"? why not take every single principle and outlook and see it through the eyes of a toddler or alien? the most basic foundations of how we live life as first-world citizens definitely deserves thought. how much water do i use a day? how much water do i have to use? how much food do i eat? enough to survive? enough to be satisfied? more than enough? how much money do i spend daily? weekly? how much should i? how much must i? ask these and other basic questions about yourself and then about the rest of the world. things are definitely changing here. everything starts in the mind. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:188863 2002-07-13T16:15:56Z 2002-07-13T16:15:56Z <h3>Today, across the world, 1.3 billion people live on less than one dollar a day; 3 billion live on under two dollars a day</h3> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:188636 2002-07-13T14:14:51Z 2002-07-13T14:14:51Z yuck i hate yardwork.<br /><br />my brother is watching spongebob and he's going on a rant about worker's rights and the fate of labor through unionization and the dismantling of oppressive institutions... it's pure genius. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:188233 2002-07-13T01:54:24Z 2002-07-13T01:54:24Z <marquee>somebody quench that fire...</marquee> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:188023 2002-07-12T04:49:03Z 2002-07-12T04:49:03Z free the yuppie: liberation<br />free the yuppie: the lofty word that can be used for anything illicit<br />free the yuppie: let's 'liberate that lexus'<br />free the yuppie: see, it sounds better than steal<br />BiggerNotBroken: haha<br />BiggerNotBroken: lets liberate those girls of their virginity.<br />free the yuppie: hahahha<br />free the yuppie: see<br />free the yuppie: they're breaking free<br />BiggerNotBroken: its been keeping them down for too long<br />free the yuppie: those shackles of oppression must be broken urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:187724 2002-07-12T03:35:42Z 2002-07-12T03:35:42Z marley- 400 years yeah mary came and picked me up and we swam in jordan's community pool tonight. i have to say, it was good seeing my friends again. and yeah the trip was good... but it's good to be home. i forgot how great things really are down here.<br /><br />i'm sort of apprehensive.. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:187625 2002-07-12T00:15:00Z 2002-07-12T00:15:00Z i'm home i'm home i'm home. whew.<br /><br />ps- wishes of happiness to the birthday girl :) urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:187300 2002-07-07T02:45:05Z 2002-07-07T02:45:05Z Subject: My Dearest Love... <br />To: impetus101@yahoo.com <br /> <br />Once upon a time there was a princess named Alexandra. She was a very fickle princess and could not find a handsome prince to marry in all the lands... that is until she stumbled upon Prince Gino. He was the most fantastic thing she had encoutnered since Mountain Dew Slurpees and Lip Gloss. "Yes she thought I must marry him..." THE END <br /><br />thanks for making me smile darling. :) urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:186860 2002-07-05T14:08:33Z 2002-07-05T14:08:33Z hopefully the twelve-gauge shotgun won't bruise my shoulder... again. haha urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:186482 2002-07-05T05:14:49Z 2002-07-05T05:14:49Z i went by walden's pond today... the very setting of henry thoreau's 'walden'. that had to be my highlight. boston was great. the ambience is spectacular. harvard wasn't very impressive... the elite? cream of the crop? come onnnnnn. oh and i found out how ridiculously expensive it would be to live there... even to rent. <br /><br />and everyone in my family makes fun of me because of the blanket i sleep with. i've had it all my life and it was sewn by indigenous guambiyanos in the andes of south america... i didn't even remember this until recently... i just like it because it's soft and maternal. apparently the pink, white and yellow squares are dorky. try ethnic, fools.<br /><br />geeeez urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:186213 2002-07-04T14:54:57Z 2002-07-04T14:54:57Z off to big ol' boston today. the hijackers took off from boston. there's security like whoa. does it bother me? nope. i mean come on, what are the odds that if there was an attack, i'd be affected? that sounds very selfish, i know... but i'm just explaining why i don't give a crap. hopefully nothing will happen and today will be a safe, enjoyable day for all.<br /><br />ps- i got the rage against the machine dvd and some of it just downright bothers me. these guys are a joke sometimes... geeeeez urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:185888 2002-07-03T04:35:47Z 2002-07-03T04:35:47Z <b>sweet asphyxiation </b><br />meandering melee of the mind <br />terrestrial reasoning bites at logic <br />leaving a strong desire for withdrawal <br />sweet, sweet chance of consumption <br />waters of charybdis simply seducing <br />engulf me whole and never let go <br />let your churning waters of tranquillity <br />plunge me ever further <br />into the nether of your grasp <br />your clutches, resolute <br />your scent, soothing <br />i ask one thing of you <br /><br />drown me <br />in your love.<br /><br /><b>untitled</b><br />the night sky seemed distant; <br />untouchable <br />when i saw you standing there <br />alone and tired, my heart cried out <br />every part of me fought to hold you <br />and i didn’t even know why <br />an air of anticipation hung thick <br />thick as my resolve to carry out <br />that which i longed for so much <br />minutes passed in the starlight <br />your smile brought me to my knees <br />and right then and there <br />a place i’d been so many times before <br />it happened. <br /><br />suddenly it all came crashing down <br />those cold, harsh hands tore me away <br />and like a brick wall, reality struck <br />i cried and cried, none of it happened <br />none of it would ever happen <br />my heart; strangled and starved <br />there was no hand to hold <br />no laughter to be heard <br /><br />the night sky was distant; <br />untouchable.<br /><br /><b>vicious cycle </b><br /><br />a vicious, vicious cycle of pain in every element <br />why did you speak deceitfully on those nights <br />systematically destroying me <br />and leaving my dreams a war-torn wasteland <br />why did you say those things on the telephone <br />to wrench my soul back and forth, <br />wringing every last drop of blood and tears you could find <br />onto your empty shoulder <br /><br />maybe when you’re lonely again you’ll be sorry <br />but i won’t be <br />maybe when you’re down on your luck, you’ll need a shoulder to cry on <br />it won’t be mine <br />because this mien has been torn violently apart <br />and your confusion and your resolution and your tears and your scars and your smiles and your kisses and your hugs and your glances and your words <br /><br />are the very definition of history.<br /><br /><br /><b>#532</b><br />preconceived notions of how to tackle monolithic pain we all stumble upon that joyous day of emergence from our mother’s womb. crawling and bawling quite a sickening cycle at the least. dull the pain, dull the pain, dull the pain. when you conclude your true motives for injecting naked words, bare sentiments come back and i’ll have a knife in my hand for you. an endless wasteland of selfishness where acts are committed for self-gain and deceit... as if it hasn’t had its claim on lives enough already. tears and sonnets all brewed in a pot of disgrace is all i’ve got in the end. screaming, screaming, screaming i’ve been staying up too late and waking up too soon to listen to the stained cries reminiscent of times when this sour blood didn’t bite at reality every moment of the day. <br /><br />rest.<br /><br /><br />you told me things that unlocked that labyrinth of my soul and now that the truth has been stabbed where it never should have been, the door is padlocked with tears and an air of forgotten happiness only you could leave behind urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:185621 2002-07-03T02:55:24Z 2002-07-03T02:55:24Z Name: gino, not luigi or luigeno or luigino or geno<br />Nicknames: hotcakes, etc etc<br />School: florida virtual school yeah baby!<br />Height: 6 foot i think<br />Siblings: david jr.<br />Pets: skip... who i'd like to murder because he's gotten me in trouble whenever i sneak out by barking<br />How many cd's do you own? couple hundred<br />How many mp3s do you own? own? own? not sure. but i downloaded like 1200<br />What color are your shoes? black <br />Describe your bedroom: bulletin board posters stereo etc etc, no television though.. phased that out years ago<br />Are you a vegetarian? EAT BEEF DIE HAPPY BITCHES<br />How about an aspiring actor/actress? ya, right<br />What famous person dead or alive would you interview if you had the chance?probably ernesto guevara<br />What movies do you have almost all the lines memorized to?i dont memorize lines to movies cock<br />Who named you? my parents, after my grandfather, geno<br />What is right next to you? stairs<br />What are the last four digits of your home phone number? 0563<br />Who do you want to spend the rest of your life with? whoopie goldberg or stone cold steve austin<br />How many people are on your buddy list? 78 in the ladies column, 53 in the lads column<br />How's the weather right now? hot and muggy<br />Are you too shy to ask a girl/guy out? nope, if i intend to i will<br />If you could change your name, what would it be?rawlings<br />What will your first son's name be?mcauly<br />What will your first daughter's name be? jemima<br />Dysfunctional family? not typically<br />What posters do you have in your room?rage against themachine, soon to be kinks, billie holiday, queen, uhh britney spears beacon in the storm umm ireland images etc etc<br />Are you talking to someone right now? yes, my alexandra<br />What time do you wake up in the mornings? 10 i guess<br />Where would you retire to? ireland<br />What are your pet peeves?people who don't call when they say they will.. <br />What makes you happy? them broads<br />What makes you sad? when i'm glad but then it's bad so i get sad about fads<br />What song are you listening to right now?marley- no woman no cry<br />Do you have a LiveJournal? duh, moron<br />If you were an ancient Greek god(dess) what would you be god of? sex, yeah yeah<br />----------------------FAVOURITES---------------------- <br />Colors:blue and green and brown<br />Kind of music:pretty much anything that's enjoyable<br />Cartoon character: coach mcguirk<br />Food: steak with hamburgers and chinese sausage (i seriously have never eaten so much meat in my life)<br />Drink: water<br />Candy: skor bars bitch<br />Talking to people on the phone or in person: in person <br />favorite language you can't speak: italian<br />Gold or silver: silver and gold, silver and gold... i forget the rest of the song that guy sings in rudolph<br />Day of the week: saturday<br />What is your anthem: people before profits<br />Best song to make out to: any fucking song as long making out is happening<br />Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter: tolkien for life bitch<br />----------------------DO YOU BELIEVE...----------------------<br />In God? yup<br />In Heaven/Hell? yup<br />In life on other planets? yup<br />In miracles? yup<br />In fate? not sure<br />It's possible to remain faithful forever? surely<br />In astrology? yeah it's real<br />In magic? there is, yeah<br />----------------------FRIENDS AND CRUSHES-------------------<br />Do you have a bf/gf? nope nope<br />Love anyone? sure<br />Who's your loudest friend? jordan lyon<br />Who is the smartest? probably bartholomew... him or justin.. maybe jordan... oh wait, no.<br />Who do you go to for advice? several people... cleo mostly<br />Who do you cry with? no one<br />Do you have any gay or lesbian friends? it's possible?<br />Do you have a best friend? yes<br />Name a cool quality in 5 of your friends: all my friends are cool.. i dont feel like listing<br />Last person you kissed? uh someone....<br />Most important trait for a bf/gf? honesty<br />Do you want to kiss someone right now? how about you go on a several week-long trip with your family, and deprive yourself of any sort of interaction with anyone, and tell me if you'd want to kiss someone. moron.<br />Who would you choose? jessica.<br />Would they want to kiss you too? ya know... i'm not too sure.<br />----------------------DO YOU....---------------------- <br />Smoke? nope<br />Do drugs? nope<br />Sleep with stuffed animals?nope<br />Live in the moment? all the time<br />Play an instrument?yess<br />Go to church? yup<br />Do well in school? sort of...<br />Go to or plan to go to college? yes, i'm going<br />Have any piercings? nope<br />Have any tattoos? not yet...<br />Hate yourself? nope<br />Have an obsession? a few, actually<br />Collect anything? some things...<br />Wish on stars? nope<br />Like your handwriting? it's terrible<br />Care about looks? to a certain extent, sure<br />Consider yourself tolerant of others? hmmm not sure.<br />Consider love a mistake? depends on who it's directed at<br />Carry a donor card? nope, these squishies are mine<br /><br />----------------------LAST THINGS YOU DID-------------------<br />Last book you read: gandhi, the story of my experiments with truth<br />Last movie you saw: minority report<br />Last song you heard: the kinks, sunny afternoon<br />Last thing you had to drink: water<br />Last thing you ate: pizza<br />What was the last film you saw in the cinema:minority report<br />What did you do for your last birthday? absolutely nothing...<br />----------------------HAVE YOU EVER...---------------------- <br />Been Mean? of course<br />Been sarcastic? all the time<br />Talked to someone you've had a crush on? what do you think i am<br />Missed someone? right now, in fact<br />Fought with your parents? all the time<br />Laughed until you've cried? at times<br />Watched a sunrise/sunset? am i alive?<br />Went to the beach at night? of course<br />Lied to get off the phone? yup<br />Written a poem? yup<br />Bought a cd for just one song?no, moron<br />Been in an airplane? several times<br />If so where were you flying to? south america<br />Been so drunk you blacked out? nope<br />Missed school because it was raining? nope <br />Kept a secret from a friend? probably<br />Had an imaginary friend? if bob saget counts, sure<br />Wanted to hook up with a friend? haha unfortunately<br />Cried during a movie? ha, me?<br />Liked a teacher?i had so many hott teachers<br />Prank called someone? i made a cd of it<br />Had a hickey? haha yes, twenty dollars if the person who gave me em replies<br />----------------------TODAY HAVE YOU....--------------------<br />Smiled? sure<br />Laughed? sure<br />Cried? nope<br />Danced? i thrusted my hips, does that count<br />Been sarcastic? uh huh<br />Talked to an ex? i am right now haha<br />Watched your favorite movie? nope<br /><br />wow, that was intensely unfulfilling. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:185121 2002-07-01T04:53:46Z 2002-07-01T04:53:46Z went to a drive-in movie tonight... same one my dad used to sneak into at my age and bring in kegs of alcohol. nothing changes around here, it's ridiculous.<br /><br />this was yesterday at my cousin's birthday party<br /><img src="http://broken.blackroses.com/members/empiresfall/yeahtoo.jpg"> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:184619 2002-06-21T05:37:37Z 2002-06-21T05:37:37Z bjork.. vespertine farewell, see you all in a while. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:183669 2002-06-19T17:08:19Z 2002-06-19T17:08:19Z go ahead and mark down biance's new video for austin powers as yet another reason why corporate-sponsored everything blows monumental ass urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:182275 2002-06-19T00:54:30Z 2002-06-19T00:54:30Z joan of arc today was interesting... i feel like such a clutz sometimes though. stumbling over my words like a knave and all.<br /><br /><br />yeah now i <b>really</b> don't want to leave. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:181897 2002-06-18T15:39:42Z 2002-06-18T15:39:42Z "S.P. adds: "In primarily Hispanic and/or East Indian communities, wiggers can be found too, but there are more "ginos" found there. "Gino" is not a derogatory term aimed against the Italians, it is a term used for persons mainly wearing tear-away Adidas track pants, tight shirts, and with hair more oily than the Exxon Valdez. Ginos perfer to drive white Honda Civics with "low wheels," tinted windows, and expensive streo systems. The music they play is abstract, because they put the bass all the way up, and the treble all the way down, so that the noise that comes out of the speakers is basically what you would sound like if you talked with your open hand firmly pressed against your mouth. You may have heard of the term "gino" but maybe you haven't. Gino Beats are the shit they play in their cars." urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:181036 2002-06-18T03:47:13Z 2002-06-18T03:47:13Z her: usually when you think "communist", segregation and slavery of blacks pops into your head<br /><br />goodness gracious the mccarthyism and negative propaganda of half a century ago is still having its effects. this is not a bashing or a criticism or the remotest intentioned form of condescension, but just a taking note of how much society, from an early age, forms our minds and our associations... <br /><br />just a note to all of you out there that are wondering what's going on, communism combats the oppression and socially negative effects it has on the minorities of our society... it's pretty much the antithesis of what was thought here urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:180880 2002-06-18T02:28:51Z 2002-06-18T02:28:51Z VinPig: his bulge is disgusting<br />VinPig: ahh<br />VinPig: we need to buy him some baggier shorts<br />VinPig: so u cant see that<br />VinPig: thats just indecent urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:179994 2002-06-17T21:45:53Z 2002-06-17T21:45:53Z yeah i went over justin's today and we traversed many leagues... arising victorious of course. now i've come home to finish the last of this wretched school... and later i think i'm gonna go see a movie with mary at the dollar theatre. it's hard to concentrate on your intellectual weaknesses when nickelodeon is blaring by your side. <br /><br />beautiful. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:179831 2002-06-17T14:53:33Z 2002-06-17T14:53:33Z ok i just realized 1,200 mp3's downloaded with a 56k is probably a bit excessive. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:178790 2002-06-16T01:19:36Z 2002-06-16T01:19:36Z modest mouse.. all night diner yeah, i had a swell time today. hung out with a certain someone that i realized i wanted to hang out with after hanging up... don't regret calling back one bit. now i feel like writing... it's sad that over the years my creative outlets have been narrowed down to solely writing... it used to be so much more. <br /><br />(i'd eat people if it was legal)<br /><br />haha urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:fervidus_tears:178376 2002-06-15T14:38:10Z 2002-06-15T14:38:10Z billie holiday.. all of me well the morning after i can look in retrospect and see that some sort of goblin was orchestrating events to unfold last night... a rising strategic cacophony of things not going right at all... and when that happens you fold under the pressure and sometimes break. yeah. it was just eerily ridiculous how badly it went.<br /><br />it's another day and it's gloomy outside.